I've offered to model at my lads' school's fund-raising fashion show and couldn't resist a further opportunity to embarrass my ten-year-old. You may recall my previous blog regarding my 'helpful' comments on the football sidelines.
Well, I was only too happy to help and strut my stuff on the cat walk. However, I still have nightmares about the last fashion show I went to as an audience member. Clearly conscious of wearing dark underwear under light-coloured clothing, the models (fellow school mums) decided to, well look, I won't beat around the bush (?), take it off, all of it.
Under the school hall's bright lights and closed proximity of the catwalk to the front row, the men in the audience suddenly stopped playing Temple Run on their iPhones I can tell you.
The ladies in the audience didn't know where to look (that's when they'd finished clipping their gawping husbands round the ear) and the children had what I can only describe as a biology lesson and rare taste of x-ray vision and a glimpse into the future all rolled into one.
(STOP PRESS: A quick and topical update to blog: it seems these unwitting ladies were in the company of Hollywood's finest as withdewrespect-favourite Ms Anne Hathaway had her own Oscar wardrobe malfunction last night with no less than Prada letting her down in the chest area discretion department)
All this banter reminds me.
My five-year-old drew a picture for me this week (see below). Which also reminds me, I must remember to lock the bathroom door.
